October 3 2009 [edit]

I'm trying to get myself to wake up, here. Might as well multitask and update at the same time, ne?

I really wish I had something interesting to write. Alas, I do not. All I have are failed plans and attempts that have been building up until I just want to crawl into my bed and sob uncontrollably. The main reason for this is because I'm almost one hundred percent sure I failed on my first Physics test. And, honestly, for the stupidest, most petty reason-- because I didn't write each problem-solving problem on a separate sheet of lined paper. First of all, he was saying these instructions to a person who will write/draw on a single sheet of paper, front an back, until there's no room left for anything else. Secondly, considering the fact that our school doesn't really have a lot of money, should we really be wasting paper? And, finally, WE'RE KILLING TREEEEES.

Lately I've been addicted to music. Even more so than usual. It's been really inspiring. Not the kind of inspiration that makes me draw, but the kind that makes me write. I've been filling up papers with tiny poems. I kind of wish I played/owned an instrument so I can set a beat/melody to them. Which brings me to my ridiculous wish that both parents laughed at; I want to own an acoustic guitar. More than I want a new graphics tablet, which says a lot. Meh, I don't know. I just really, really want to go back to playing an instrument. I loved playing the flute in 5th grade, and really hated having to quit. I still have my book- it's here next to me. I'm sad I don't remember how to read sheet music as quickly as I used to. :[ I'll look for a cheap guitar and just buy it for myself if my parents don't agree. I can afford one from walmart. :\

I'm listening to Wake Up by Mackintosh Braun. The irony? I'm getting so sleeepy. I'll see if I can go see Whip It, if not, sleep. c:

Blah. I dislike the former post for this day.

This is what the lack of social interaction does. Honestly, I doubt I've said more than 100 words today. I've had profound conversations in my head, but that doesn't feel quite the same. ;]

I still feel blah, though. That much hasn't changed. It's this odd, perpetual drowsiness coupled with drinking massive amounts of water/liquid and a strange craving for anything sweet. It's left me in this lethargic state of sadness, the soundtrack of which has been A little Bit Longer and Lovebug by the Jonas Brothers, and various angst songs from my angsty junior high years. I'll be going to sleep listening to Owl City, which should mellow me out for the morrow. Tomorrow brings the promise of Coney chili cheese fries and shopping for art supplies, albeit only if I wake up in time for church. :\

Win some, lose some. Just make sure you see the inspiration in it.